Wednesday, September 30, 2009

Love and Marriage

What do you see to the right there? Do you see a toothpaste tube with every last bit of toothpaste squeezed mercilessly from its insides? Or do you wonder why anyone would even dream of throwing out what is obviously a tube of toothpaste with some life left in it?

My friends, on a good day, the lifeless piece of refuse pictured to the right can make me ponder lovingly the endearing foibles of the man I've hitched my life to for eternity. It can remind me of the admirable male strength my husband must possess to be able (for almost 20 years now) to squeeze just a little bit more from a seemingly empty tube of toothpaste.

But on a bad week? That picture is Exhibit A of why half of all marriages end in divorce. I swear, without me around to holler "Nuff" and walk all the way to the linen closet to get a spankin' brand new Colgate, Larry would still be using the tube he started in 1991. What's up with that?

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19 comments:

  1. In my house, I am the "get the very last bit" culprit...I run the tube along the edge of the counter to force every smidgeon up to the top...
    Sadly, I am the same way with Mayo, apple sauce, peanut butter, margarine...Thank goodness for varying sizes of rubber spatula!
    Blessedly my DH puts up with me! :)

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  2. I also run the tube along the edge of the counter.

    My wife? She squeezes from the middle of the tube.

    So, I let her brush first and then "fix" it [smile].

    ~Luke

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  3. We control what we can. It may be his only thing left :)

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  4. How funny! Larry and I are desperate squeezers, it seems. My Mr. D has no patience and breaks out a new tube when the old one has "at least" two weeks' worth of toothpaste in it!
    Your perspective on your Larry is very sweet.

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  5. JMac is the same as your husband with getting the very last bit. Yet he will dump an entire bag of potato chips in a bowl, throw away the bag, then not eat all the chips and leaves them unwrapped in the bowl in the pantry to go stale. For the life of me I don't understand how he can be so careful with the damn toothpaste and so careless with the chips! Maybe I'm not suppose to understand and that's why I just sigh and go on with my day.

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  6. Depends on the price of the item in question. Toothpaste can be tossed without much thought, but Rx's cannot, nor can cosmetics.

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  7. Oh, we all have our things, don't we? I hate how he unfolds the top of the sheets so the edge is fwapping in my face. He hates how I leave the tea bag sitting in the bottom of the mug for whoever washes the dishes before bed (usually him) to deal with. So what do YOU do that drives Larry nuts? :-)

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  8. There would be too many things to list, I'm sure. He hates that I never close the bread bag properly (he's right). He hates that I knit while he is talking. And I'm sure that the way I keep house does not make his heart sing!

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  9. I'm that way with toothpaste, too... kind of funny since I am also a middle-squeezer.

    Today's crazy thing? I found evidence that I purchased a new scouting shirt & hat, but I CANNOT find them anywhere. It's driving me crazy! And Pack meeting is tonight at 7pm. I am SO in trouble...

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  10. I am the "get the very last drop" person in our house. In fact my husband and I just had the tootpaste is empty discussion this morning, I told him there is still a week's worth in there!! He laughed... I am like that with almost everything except DRINKS. EW, can't ever drink the last part of anything... gross!

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  11. The next step is to keep an X-acto knife in the drawer to cut off the top of the tube to get at least two more brushfulls out that can't be "squozed" from the flattened tube.

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  12. I just move on to the new tube when I'm ready, and let my husband do what he wants with the old one.

    However, he's taken to hiding the new tubes in the back of a utility closet. He doesn't know I have found his hiding place. :)

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  13. We've never had toothpaste problems in our marriage. (until the kids came along and started squeezing it directly into the sink)
    Now if you were going to talk about replacing the toilet paper roll when it's empty............

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  14. I'm with Angela. My husband is the same way, and I'm for being frugal. I just simply let him keep it and keep milking it for as long as he wants. I just start another tube. We are a perfect couple that way. We have come along way since we were newlyweds - we had two different brands and no one was willing to budge on selecting one.

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  15. I say, let him keep using that "not empty" tube of Colgate, but get out a new tube for you to use until he gives up on the "not empty" one. Compromise, grasshopper, compromise...

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  16. It'll be the col gates of Prell when my husband will throw away an empty container in the bathroom.

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  17. If you ever find the answer as to why men can't grab another tube of toothpaste, perhaps you can help me figure out why it is that they also can't ever seem to find the trash can in the kitchen and therefore leave a wrapper of every kind on the counter. :)

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  18. My older kids all have chores every day, like sweeping all the floors, dishes and laundry. They still leave empty instant oatmeal and hot Chocolate envelopes on the kitchen table. They will be cleaning them up before dinner, why not throw them out when they are empty?

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  19. Thank you for the reminder that small, ridiculous things can cause friction in all marriages. Let us all put everything in perspective. By the way, I squeeze every drop out and my husband doesn't. :)

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